Finding a Life Manual

Girls to stay away from when online dating

Guys, stay away from girls with any of the following red flags in their profile:

-A gargantuan checklist of what they want in a man. There’s a reason they’re still single: Because no guy in the history of Earth has ever met their 48 requirements.

-Face-only pics = She’s fat. If you still haven’t figured out this phenomenon, you deserve a blubbery doom. (Though sadly, I agreed to dates with three of these deceptive girls before finally accepting this fact—and I call myself a man of logic.)

-Glamour-shot only pics = She’s ugly. If she has nothing but professional, blurry, photoshoppy-looking pictures, she’s hiding something—usually a devastating case of acne along with 30 extra pounds around the thighs and midsection. Plus she’s one of those retarded chicks who thinks she’s a part-time model because her photographer friend snapped a few shots of her not looking at the camera.

-Her username has “Diva,” “Princess,” “Sexy,” or “Classy” in it. She’ll look like Snooky and talk like Paris.

-She demands you come up with “something clever” for the first date. This chick has no interests of her own and is lame enough to demand a human tour guide through life. Unless you’re into the missionary position and Grey’s Anatomy, steer clear.

-She’s under the age of 24. I know it’s tempting, but don’t do it—you’d only be contributing to the problem. They waste their money and your time. She’s not on the website to hook up or find a man. She’s here for the attention—nothing more.

A smart angle on how to get rid of people who are likely to be overly picky, deceiving, or self-absorbed.

In terms of seeking attention, I would say this applies to emotionally immature girls. It is possible for young girls to be mature, just unusual. It is however common for maturity to escape some older girls.