December 2011
1 post
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The Key to Happiness: A Taboo for Adults? →
Grownups aren’t supposed to play. We have problems. We’re too busy. We have important things to do. It turns out, though, that there are few things more important to your happiness than frequent doses of play. As a study led by Princeton researcher Alan Krueger found, of all the things on the planet, we’re at our happiest when we’re involved in engaging leisure...
October 2011
6 posts
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“We all have a short period of time on this earth. We probably only have the...”
– Steve Jobs Bio: Its 6 Most Surprising Reveals | Gadget Lab | Wired.com
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Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunction Is a Growing... →
Here’s a simple test: Try to masturbate (alone) using no porn and no fantasy—only sensual touch. Use the same speed and pressure as you would during intercourse. How erect is your penis without porn? If your penis is not fully erect, or it takes effort to become erect, then the chances are that anxiety is not the source of your problems.
Recent behavioral addiction research suggests...
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“85 percent of the reason you get and keep a job is because of your people...”
– Matt McKinney
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September 2011
6 posts
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Magic Mushrooms Can Change Personalities For The... →
Under scientific controlled conditions, researchers gave 51 adults either psilocybin or a placebo in up to five eight-hour sessions. In almost 60 per cent of patients, Of the 51, 30 had a mystical experience, after which their ‘openness’ scores rose. The 21 who did not have a mystical experience showed no change.
“I say this because we think of personality as being cemented in...
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Do men generally grow grumpier with age? →
My impression from following science journalism for a decade or so, and just confirmed by a quick google search, is that: 1. As people grow older, they tend to be happier/more positive. 2. As people grow older, men to be happier than women. See [1] and [2] for references for the first claim, and [2] and [3] for references for the second claim. Of course, for 1 it might be that the unhappy ones...
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Valedictorian Speaks Out Against Schooling In... →
Comment: The following speech was delivered by top of the class student Erica Goldson during the graduation ceremony at Coxsackie-Athens High School on June 25, 2010
“Here I stand
There is a story of a young, but earnest Zen student who approached his teacher, and asked the Master, “If I work very hard and diligently, how long will it take for me to find Zen? The Master thought...
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What are some ways people integrate humor into... →
Humor is extremely individualized, and its implications can be far reaching. You use it to express how you feel, but in a creative way. Feeling + creative expression = the best use of humor in life. So how exactly do you use creative expression, together with humor? Did you watch Borat? There was actually a humor instructor in Borat, and that instructor would teach Borat things like “Say...
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How can you maximize your happiness in life? →
Have positive relationships with supportive people.
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Web Surfing Makes You Work Better, Study Says →
they assigned 96 undergraduate management students into one of three groups—a control group, a “rest-break” group and a Web-surfing group. All subjects spent 20 minutes highlighting as many letter e’s as they could find in a sample text. For the next 10 minutes, the control group was assigned another simple task; members of the rest-break group could do whatever they pleased,...
August 2011
5 posts
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Guys are "over-aroused" by video games&porn... and... →
Boys are 30 percent more likely than girls to drop out of school. In Canada, five boys drop out for every three girls. Girls outperform boys now at every level, from elementary school to graduate school. There’s a 10 percent differential between getting BA’s and all graduate programs, with guys falling behind girls. Two-thirds of students in special ed remedial programs are...
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What's the secret to making a few good friends? →
you don’t just have to help someone or need help in a physical way to to develop a reciprocity that leads to friendship, you can also build it by both of you talking about problems, concerns, challenges etc.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200611/friendship-the-laws-attraction
This article quotes a few psychologists that believe this kind of reciprocity is key to turning...
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How Self-talk can improve your life and your... →
This is a great idea on how talking to yourself (in your head) during sports can focus your attention and improve results.
Read the whole article.
This section shows the applicability beyond sports.
In fact, the technique originally came from cognitive behavioral therapy, as a tool to help people overcome persistent thought patterns, behaviors, and interpretations of events. You talk to...
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Nonverbal signals to tell others they are liked →
Our brains continually scan the environment for friend or foe signals. People who pose a threat give off foe cues and people who do not pose a threat give off friend cues. When you meet people, ensure that you send the right nonverbal cues that signal that you are not a threat.
Eyebrow Flash
The eyebrow flash is a quick up and down movement of the eyebrows. As people approach one another...
July 2011
22 posts
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Girls to stay away from when online dating →
Guys, stay away from girls with any of the following red flags in their profile:
-A gargantuan checklist of what they want in a man. There’s a reason they’re still single: Because no guy in the history of Earth has ever met their 48 requirements.
-Face-only pics = She’s fat. If you still haven’t figured out this phenomenon, you deserve a blubbery doom. (Though sadly, I agreed to dates with...
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“People in corporations often say, “It’s business, it’s not...”
– Work Is Personal | Psychology Today
Great article. Read the whole thing.
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“Playing hard to get is a timeworn technique for snagging that desired...”
– Marketing: Being Jilted Can Make You Yearn More—or So You Think
In the study, participants were asked to solve several puzzles and were told that if their performance was in the top 25th percentile, they would receive a gift. Then, at random, some were told they had met the goal, while others were...
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Top Signs You're Not An Alpha Male →
You Suck Up To Leaders And Seek Their Approval.
An Alpha Male doesn’t suck up to anyone. He is the leader.
You Blame Others
An Alpha Male takes responsibility for his own actions.
Silly little quotes, but they resonated for whatever reason.
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Every Girl's Crazy 'Bout A Sharp Dressed Man -... →
* 91% of Americans think that dressing well can help boost a man’s looks by making him appear more physically attractive than he really is.
*Women think a well dressed man is confident (75%), sophisticated (44%), smart (37%), or sexy (37%)
*78% of women believe that one of the hottest things a guy can do is dress well.
*Nearly three in ten (29%) women wouldn’t even consider a second date...
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How to Resist Temptations →
She placed three groups of people in a room containing a delicious-looking chocolate cake and the implements to divide and eat it.
The first group was put into the room and told to think about the shame and guilt they would feel if they ate it.
The second was told to think about how proud they would be ofnoteating it.
The third group, the control group, was put in the room and given no...
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How do you open up conversation at a party where... →
Walk up to a group of 3 - 4 in conversation. Start listening. If the context of the conversation isn’t immediately clear, asked someone not currently engaged what they’re talking about. Wait for an appropriate time to interject. Smoothly join the conversation and find a place to introduce yourself as soon as possible.
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This is pathetic: guys like girls that laugh at... →
we measured the importance participants placed on a partner’s production of humor vs. receptivity to their own humor. Men emphasized the importance of their partners’ receptivity to their own humor, whereas women valued humor production and receptivity equally. In a second task, participants chose whether they preferred a person who only produced humor or a person who only...
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What clothes do women like on men? →
clothes that fit well. Men often wear what is comfortable, but if it fits like pajamas, it probably looks like pajamas. Comfort is 50% mental. Wearing clothing that fits properly means you may have to “get over yourself” and get accustomed to a non-pajama feel. The compliments and attention you will get from others, especially women should make it worth it.
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What is the best piece of advice women would like... →
what a lot of men don’t realize is that every time an unknown man approaches a woman, it is by default threatening. The best way for a man to understand this is that women view strange men the way men view cops: probably harmless, but always carrying a non-zero chance that they will inflict violence on you and you will not be able to defend yourself. As a man, if you see a cop approach...
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Is it true that "less intelligent" people are... →
No. Here’s a really good meta-analytic review of the many studies done in this area. Some key findings in this research area: In a meta-analysis of 26 studies of individuals, intelligence was NOT found to be correlated with happiness. In short, cognitive abilities do not, on the average, lead to more or less happiness.
The effect was found for both longitudinal studies and snapshot...
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What is the best way to motivate yourself to... →
the Arnold Schwarzenegger approach: put your weaknesses on display so others can see them and you get social pressure to improve.
As a young bodybuilder, his calves weren’t as developed as the rest of his body. Instead of hiding them, he cut off the bottoms of the sweat pants he worked out in so that every day, everyone else in the gym could see his small calves. It was constant...
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If you are a man, what are the pros and cons of... →
Pros:
Models are almost always mellow in daily life. They’re used to gliding through life without a ton of responsibility, and so they don’t tend to be as high-strung as the average woman (or man, for that matter).
They tend to value you, as a guy, on something other than your looks, because they’ve spent time with male models and have fished those waters.
If you’re...
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Facebook is all too often your past life...not... →
I’ve been using Facebook for years and will keep doing so. During this long journey as a Facebook user, I realized some very interesting facts History Book: The biggest use of Facebook is to connect with people who ‘mattered’ to you most in the past rather than who actually matters right now. e.g. 90% of people on my Facebook are the ones with whom I was associated in the...
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Can people change their personalities or are they... →
Personalities can change. It usually happens unconsciously and people usually don’t even realize that they are changing.
I say this from experience. I spent a long time with one person and I picked up a lot of her mannerisms and behaviors (including a lot of her style of talking and joking around), and I didn’t even realize it until later.
There is actually psychological research...
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Hedonic treadmill →
The hedonic treadmill, also known as hedonic adaptation, is the supposed tendency of humans to quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness despite major positive or negative events or life changes. According to this theory, as a person makes more money, expectations and desires rise in tandem, which results in no permanent gain in happiness
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“The daily activities most associated with happiness are sex, socializing after...”
– Op-Ed Columnist - The Sandra Bullock Trade - NYTimes.com
From a larger article on how money doesn’t buy happiness…
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“Bhutanese believe happiness equals wanting what you have — imagine...”
– Chip Conley: Measuring what makes life worthwhile | Video on TED.com
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“Maybe we mistakenly think we want “happiness,” which we tend to picture in very...”
– Tim Kreider
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To be happier, give your money away, spend it on... →
One of the most consistent findings of the happiness literature is that having a strong social network is an excellent predictor of happiness they surveyed 632 Americans on their general happiness, along with what they spent their money on, and found that higher “prosocial spending” - gifts for others and donations to charity - was indeed correlated with higher self-reported happiness. But was the...
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“the more people make above $75,000, the more they feel their life is working out...”
– Study: Money Buys Happiness When Income Is $75,000 - TIME
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Sisters and Happiness - Understanding the... →
they talked to their sisters more often, at greater length and, yes, about more personal topics. This often meant that they felt closer to their sisters.
June 2011
15 posts
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“people’s happiness levels can change substantially over their lifetimes,...”
– Happiness Levels Not Set in Stone | Happiness Not Predetermined by Genes or Personality, Long-Term Satisfaction | LiveScience
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“a study led by Princeton researcher Alan Krueger found, of all the things on the...”
– Joe Robinson: The Key to Happiness: A Taboo for Adults?
As someone who used to work to much, I love seeing little studies like this.
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Mindfulness therapy puts the focus on improving... →
Research shows that you’re happier if you’re focused on the present.
A December study published in the Archives of General Psychiatry found that mindfulness therapy can be as effective as remaining on antidepressants to prevent a relapse of depression.
More here
Researchers found people spend about 47% of their waking hours thinking about something other than what they’re...
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Yes people do have multiple identities...Mark... →
He deconstructs Facebook CEO Zuckerberg’s assertion that the days of people having more than one identity are collapsing because of the internet with a quote from W.E.B. DuBois on how slaves had different identities…and how different identities are necessary to deal with how you interact with people who have power over various aspects of your lives - and the need to politely conform...
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“For the past three decades, scientists and popularizers have tried to tell us...”
– THE MDM WONDERLANCE * SCIENTECH * PROF. FRANS DE WAAL
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Big Spenders Attract Flings, But Not Marriage →
In the study, participants found men who purchased luxury products more desirable for a fling than the same man who chose a non-luxury item. The catch? They weren’t more likely to prefer that same guy for a marriage partner, as they inferred the showy spending meant he was interested in uncommitted sex. “People may feel that owning flashy things makes them more attractive as a...
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When we do a person a favor, we tend to like them... →
The Ben Franklin Effect
When we do a person a favor, we tend to like them more as a result. This is because we justify our actions to ourselves that we did them a favor because we liked them.
Benjamin Franklin himself said, “He that has once done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another than he whom you yourself have obliged.”
The reverse effect is also true, and we come to hate...
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Venting - sadness and anger are defense mechanisms...
So I just posted on how getting angry typically actually makes you feel worse than you otherwise would. Anger can be productive when used to stand up for yourself, but if the goal is catharsis, anger falls short.
I think the same actually is true for sadness. The idea is that some people think that they can feel better by releasing all their sadness - just showing everyone how sad they are, but...
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“Many people believe in the “catharsis hypothesis” and think that expressing...”
– Why These 6 Happiness “Boosters” Might Actually Make You Feel Worse
So actually sticking up for yourself and getting angry when you are wronged is normal and healthy, but venting…the idea of just letting out a torrent of negative emotions expressing how angry you are…that’s...
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